constant heart of my devotion

i'm seeing Beach House tonight!!!!
i is most elated

Hans and Jane Celebrate Mabon, part II

Read part 1 here.

When they stepped outside, the two friends breathed in air that felt distinctly more crisp and spicy than it was yesterday. Perhaps knowing it was the first day of autumn made their imaginations a little more active, but really, does it matter?
"Jane", said Hans after they had walked a few minutes, "My mother always used to tell me it was dangerous to go out on Mabon."
Jane looked over at him, carefully and quickly stepping over and around acorns, oak leaves and pebbles with all 4 of her tiny feet. "Some creatures think it is an evil day," she replied quietly. "The ones that walk on 2 legs sometimes do strange things in the woods. They use fire, dark colors, and it smells awful weird."
Hans shivered, but not because he was cold.
"Anyway," Jane went on, "I don't know what any of it means. I just know it's the day we thank the Grand Maker for the orange leaves, the clear air, and all the other things that happen when autumn comes."
Hans thought this over as they crawled over a very large root. "That sounds nice," he said.
When they made it over the root, Jane stopped. "I think this is it," she said; mostly to herself. Her nose pointed into the air, as she looked above her. Hans followed her gaze, and lifted his eyes into the canopy of an enormous old oak tree. He knew it well. Its gnarled but graceful branches, spreading farther than any other oak in the forest both fascinated and frightened him. Something so big, so old, had to have a kind of power in it...and it made him feel afraid and safe at the same time. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts, he didn't even notice that Jane had begun walking away.
"Hans!" she called.
He looked at her, and to his surprise, she had begun to climb the tree!
"This way! Come!"
"Up the tree?" he squeaked, his feet moving him slowly in her direction.
"Yes of course! Don't tell me you've never climbed it before??"
Hans felt a little embarrassed. "No," he said quietly, looking at his fingers.
At this Jane gave a little laugh of joy. "Excellent! Then this will be even better!" She exclaimed. "Come on, Hans! Oh stop staring at your feet and follow me. It really isn't that terrible. And you'll be really glad you did; you'll see."
"Okay" said Hans. And he began pulling himself up.

~

hanging out with andrew, pip and brie

~~~

Hans and Jane Celebrate Mabon, part 1

Once, in a quiet green country next to an old, old forest, there was a little mouse named Hans.
Now Hans was so very unspectacular that there really is no good reason to write about him. He was a bit small (even for mouse) and kept his little home very tidy. The latter is worth mentioning because most mice are very messy; letting food fall and scatter where it may, and worse, not even having a separate room for grooming!--and other, ah, more private activities. He lived in a little wooden box next to a field, and was very comfortable; yes, quite content.
Indeed, up until the day of which i am writing, one could say that the most extraordinary thing Hans ever did was to sleep too long one Wednesday and miss his morning stretch.
Today, however (unbeknownst to him), would be different. He awoke with the dawn, and performed his exercises in the pure light of a new day. He made use of a few drops of dew to wash his coat, and carried two more inside with him. One to drink with his breakfast, and the other for when Jane came over. Jane was his particular friend, who could be also described as peculiar, for she enjoyed painting.
She arrived promptly at 8:15, carrying a ripe raspberry. Hans squeaked in delight and they both went inside to enjoy their now much-improved meal. They sat at a little flat rock that served excellently as a table. Jane told Hans about the things she had seen on her way over, about the leaves on the trees starting to turn gold and scarlet (she always used very exciting names for colors), and how she climbed into a briar to pick the very last berry she could see (she was also very thoughtful).
"Did you know," said Jane, "that today is the first day of autumn?"
"Is it?" replied Hans. "I hadn't realized that it had come so soon!" Jane always remembered these things.
She took a sip of her water. "The year has gone by rather quickly."
Hans nodded, his mouth full of raspberry.
"What do you suppose we should do?" She asked.
Hans swallowed. "Do?"
"Of course! It's Mabon Day! We should celebrate." She studied his lack of enthusiasm. "Last year you insisted on dusting. I couldn't even get you outside."
Hans stared at his paws, "Well, it was important," he replied feebly.
"Not this year," said Jane. "This year i have something planned."
Hans thought of all the things that would have to be put off until tomorrow. "Alright," he said, doing his best to sound positive. "But first let me clean up breakfast."
"Oh good good!" Jane hopped up and began to clear the little table immediately.


~

see here

Loveliest sister

I've been helping Wren teach her art classes...it's fantastic. Most of the actual teaching is done with the older kids, but here are some pictures of the kindergarteners...








~~~

#1 worst feeling in the world:

disappointing people.

i'm deeply sorry to the people i have let down recently...
Pip, Bettina, Jeff (Bishop), Sarah and Alec, my mom, Andrew, Katie, and all those whom i have bailed on and failed to get in touch with.
i love you SO SO much...i don't take you for granted...and i wanted you all to know that. i owe you all my right arm for putting up with me.

love, colleen

ps...getting sick is no fun either...maybe the #9 worst feeling. i'm sorry for everyone who's sick. you probably got it from me when i sneezed 200 mph last night.

~

avid sister

i'm at Video Symphony with sarah, keeping her company while she works on the editing equipment in preparation to start classes again next week. she is putting together the wedding video, which looks great so far...
so i brought books...and stuff to write...and fruity gum to chew on...

tomorrow i'm driving down to San Diego to go to the Street Scene, and i am immensely excited. i'll be dead tired, but that's okay. i was also supposed to see Goldfrapp on sunday but i don't have $45 for a ticket. :(

hmmm hmm. isn't she the most loveliest? i mean Sarah, of course

i like just being near her. not seeing her a lot makes me want to always hug her and tap her and tell her random things when i'm able to have 5 minutes alone with her. kind of like i want to do right now...but i have to let her work so SHHHHH be quiet! you're so annoying. geez.

~~~

Lord, sometimes....sometimes a day will be so bizarre, so surprising, and so terribly unpleasant i just have to laugh about it because it could only have come from You.
well...i'm not laughing quite yet...i still kind of feel run over by a truck.
but i'll get there eventually.


~

Ants are evil creatures

telepictionary with my friends in laguna is quite fun :)
(9.8.08)












and, a little trip down memory lane.
i posted this 4 years ago today...remember grandma and grandpa?

~

how can people just cut you out of their life
like cutting a branch from a tree

and go on
like nothing they said or did ever mattered


like they never said i love you


like you never shared anything


as if you never even existed



~

sometimes life is like singing
sometimes you sit and people watch


and sometimes you're just barely hanging in there



~

caid n pip

two of the loves of my life...
hypnotized by Avatar...





zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

roozez

inchworm























narwahl!!










my friend alina trying to stand in my pathetic little 2-inch heels. psh. russian lesbians...




















me

starbucks has been spelling my name right lately...what does it MEAN??

so. my day so far.

this morning Dee decided to wake up at 6:30...it's a good thing i'm a light sleeper!! :D (:P)

i gave her a shower, made breakfast, and spent the rest of the morning finishing packing her suitcase and cleaning up the house (she's leaving with her family to go to a wedding for 4 days)

i then drove back to orange and saw a movie by myself. a rare thing that i enjoy immensely.

right now i am sitting in a starbucks. there is (are?) a man and a woman about 10 feet away who are gossiping and saying the f-word about every 8 seconds.
i'm really hungry but i kind of regret buying a cheese danish instead of going next door to get a salad.
coffee is good.
about 6 inches from my hand is Breaking Dawn...of which i have only a few more chapters. i have been putting off reading them for days!!!
well, because that's what i do.
oh thank God...the couple left.
anyway, i don't know if i can bring myself to completely finish the book.
because.

when i leave here i'm going to my apartment to pack and clean for a few hours. i've been procrastinating like crazy moving out...i really need to get on it...
then this evening i'm back to laguna to see some friends and show them an impromptu movie that we made last month that i edited together. so that should be fun :)
now that i have my camera back (mom and dad took it with them to hawaii) there will be more pictures. promise.

i thought i was going to be all mopey today because...well, to be honest, i've been really sad and lonely :D
...but it's been alright! probably because i've kept myself from thinking too hard.
very healthy.

anyway, now that in a hyper moment of writing (thank you caffeine) i've given out way too much information, i will go. the danish is calling me; and i have a book to finish.

maybe.


~~~~

hmm hmm

hi. i'm in laguna niguel again...i have to go pick up Dee from her physical therapy pretty soon, but i thought i'd just write a little bit about what i've been up to. in general, lots of driving, talking and making stuff. not enough sleeping...especially when dancing at the Echo on sunday night to Morrisey...hooray for Smith's night!!
i started 2 new paintings...one of my sister, and a landscape for my uncle tom.
listening to lots of music...beach house (of course), and a few mixes people have given me. thank you alec and pip.
sarah alec and i watched the first 2 harry potter movies b/c alec had never seen them...that was pretty fun. i hadn't seen them in years...
last night was the first UCLA game in the Rose Bowl and i could hear people screaming and cheering while i was in my bedroom with the fan on. the fireworks pretty much scared Maela half to death...
kristina and i made pickles on saturday...they should be ready in just over a week!
i can't wait for the weather to get cold. we've had a pretty mild summer, so it'll be a while i'm guessing. bummer.
yesterday i went to Alec and Sarah's and sare made belgian waffles.
been doing okay...still waiting to hear back about a job prospect. there are some commissions i may have coming up that i'm excited about.

okay that's all for now :)


~~~~~