Colleen Rennt...

I've been realizing more and more how i need to start getting regular sleep and exercise. I've also been realizing that there's never a "good time" to start. So yesterday i figured i'd start today. So what if my left knee is screwed up? so what if my poor toe is so red and swollen i can hardly fit it in a running shoe? I'm a terrible procrastinator, and i knew i'd keep giving myself excuses until july. That, and i kept picturing myself being in the same shape i was in in high school when i was on cross-country.

For some reason or other i havn't been sleeping well lately. It's becoming increasingly irritating.
Last night as i got to bed at MIDNIGHT (so early for me), i began fantasizing about how awesome it would be to get up and actually go running in the morning. I hadn't done so for so long...and i want SO badly to get beck into a routine again. So i set my alarm for 7:30 and rolled over and closed my eyes.
And i waited.
and waited
and waited.
Dad noisily opened the door at one point looking for the dog.
i still waited.
My mind would NOT stop racing! I kept praying to calm down...knowing i was only sabotaging by well-intended efforts to add some sense of order back into my life. But i just wouldn't stop thinking. So often i don't have that problem (; but not at night.
I set my alarm for 8.
I did sleep for a little while, until i woke up. go fig.
I found i had thrashed my bed to smithereens and tried in vain to untangle the mess of sheets and blankets on the floor. no use. i just threw them on top of me and tried to calm down.
Again, my consciousness wavered for a couple of hours...until Maela started barking. It was about 6. I was exhausted, but i didn't want her waking up mom, or my grandparent's helper who sleeps right next to the bathroom where Maela sleeps. So i got up way to fast and got really dizzy, went to the bathroom and picked her up. To my utter delight, she piddled on the floor as i hoisted her.
I went to the back door and let her out and closed it. She stood there looking at me throught the glass, her little tail wagging, eyes so forlorn. i knew she wouldn't go unless i was out there. So i stepped outside, careful to keep my fingers in the door so it didn't lock behind me. It was barely light out, and i was freezing in my bare feet. She went out on the vast lawn and peed. She also came bounding back and started jumping on my legs with her muddly paws and in a split second i released my hold on the door...
i was locked out. I think i may have actually cursed under my breath, and i reached over to the place where we have a key hidden. No luck someone had taken the key.
I stood there hugging myself and shivering, wondering what the heck i was supposed to do. So i walked around the side of the house and tried the other back door, the sliding doors, and came away defeated. I must have looked hilarious though, with my massive hair wild all around my head, ragged t-shirt, bare feet and scrunched up face, mumbling curses to myself.
My only choice was to wake up Sarah. So i tiptoed across the frigid wet lawn and knocked on her window...
I'm sure you can guess the rest. I put both dogs outside and left them there.
I wiped off my feet and crawled back into my disheveled bed...and set my alarm for 8:30.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnd i waited.
and waited.
But couldn't sleep.
I think i got maybe another half-hour. When i got up at 8:45, i felt like crap.
But i got some running clothes on, found a watch, drank some water and took off.

It was awful. And i'm not a wimp either, as my knee and toe had nothing to do with it. I just forgot how out of shape i was. In a way, though, that's what kept me going. and i did about 2 and a half miles in 40 minutes. Not what i had hoped, since this time last year i could run just 2 miles in way under half that time. I suppose the fact that the run back is slightly uphill the whole way also didn't help...but oh well. I can only improve from here...and that's good.

i guess that's it. hmmm.
still waiting on those snail pictures.

have a good week...