Thursday, July 31


i keep having these dreams that are so real and true-to-life and unspectacular that in the last week or two, i have been having a genuinely hard time separating them from my waking life. i will recall a conversation i had with someone a few days ago and either laugh, or breathe a sigh of relief that i was able to talk to them, or be upset about its outcome, or happy...
...and then about a minute later realize that it never happened.
and i get all confused and frustrated because i had been basing my thoughts and reactions towards that person based on the "interaction" i had with them.
last night i had a dream with literally every single person i know in it. i'm not even joking. there were the sort of "main characters" sister, a girl i knew from LCAD named Sarah, Krystyl, Pip, Edan, some of my extended family members...and dozens of others. it was overwhelming.
waking up was overwhelming also.
i had "worked out" a lot of things in the dream...had important talks...experienced real emotions...and i am kind of reeling a little bit because they freaking never even happened!!
but...they kind of did. because i have vivid memories of real experiences.
i don't know if i can really explain it but it's been driving me crazy and having a very real impact on me lately.

okay. i have to go move out of my studio now.


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