lessons

i've never been so scared.

i am just one in the midst of so many around me who don't know what God is doing in my life. And i don't take for granted the privilege of waiting on the Lord...despite how much i give Him grief for it. Waiting hurts. Sometimes it hurts a lot more than other times. i found out some...interesting things about myself today. One always expects that gaining clarity means gaining relief...i also found out today that sometimes the opposite happens.
i know He's doing something but i feel i'm searching my way through with closed eyes...listening and waiting with desperation. What will come of this, Lord? What could possibly come of this?

And what do i do until then?

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"Look, I go forward,
but He is not there.
And backward,
but I cannot percieve Him;

When He works on the left
hand, I cannot behold Him.
When He turns to the right
hand, I cannot see Him.

But He knows the way that I
take;
When He has tested me,
I shall come forth as gold.

My foot has held fast to His
steps;
I have kept His way
and not turned aside.

I have not departed from the
commandment of His lips;
I have treasured the words
of His mouth
More than my necessary food..."

~Job 23:8-12...NKJV

I don't dare suggest that i am as steadfast and faithful as Job was as he wrote this...but it is a beautiful passage...and strangely comforting.


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